Teachers

Goal disclosure can be a powerful tool. When the teacher’s empathy is genuine, the student experiences a connection with the teacher that is deeply caring. Goal disclosure will help you better understand your student, and your student will gain valuable insights about his or her deeper needs and motivations.

Taking care of yourself is the best gift you can give your students.

Too often students (and adults) blame others for their feelings by saying, “You make me feel _____.” This is not true. No one can make anyone else feel something. They might invite you to feel something, but you always have a choice. One way to help your students take responsibility for their feelings is by teaching the skill of using “I” messages.

Do you sometimes expect your students to control their behavior when you have not controlled your own? We don’t mean to instill guilt; rather, we want to create awareness. We often catch ourselves behaving in ways we aren’t proud of once we have taken time to calm down and assess our actions.

As a teacher, do you have a tendency toward being a little too kind, and have difficulty being firm? (You don’t want to be one of those mean, autocratic teachers.) Or are you a little too firm because you think kindness can be wishy-washy? (You don’t want to be one of those permissive teachers.)

I never cease to be amazed at the wonderful people who are attracted to do Positive Discipline work. They are such creative, fun, dedicated, and passionate people who really believe it is possible to create peace in the world through peace in homes and schools.

One of the most important skills that both models mutual respect and allows children to develop their perceptions of personal capability is open-ended questioning. This Positive Discipline Tool, Curiosity Questions, also helps develop “social feeling” because the child feels respectfully included.

Where did we ever get the crazy idea that in order to make children do better, first we have to make them feel worse? —Jane Nelsen

Conferences are respectful when parents, teachers, and students are all included. 

Do you sometimes have the feeling that your students don’t hear a word you say? You are probably right—especially when a mistaken goal is involved.