Teachers

From the book, Raising Self-Reliant Children in a Self-Indulgent World,
by H. Stephen Glenn & Jane Nelsen

Do you create any of the following barriers regularly with someone you love? Do you believe that if you worked at it you could use them less often? Let's look at an example as a means of understanding the barriers and builders. Suppose four-year-old Linda becomes stuck when her tricycle wheel runs off the sidewalk. There are several ways a parent could handle this situation that would decrease feelings of capability:

Where did we ever get the crazy idea that the way to make a child "do" better is to first make him or her "feel worse"? That is the premise of punishment; and it is truly crazy. Think of the last time you felt scolded and humiliated by another adult. Were you thinking, "This is so helpful. I really appreciate it. I will now do so much better, and I can hardly wait to consult you will all my problems." Unlikely. The truth is that children (and adults) do better when they feel better.

If you are a teacher, have you been teaching long enough to remember when children sat in neat rows and obediently did what they were told? If you are a parent, do you remember when children wouldn’t dare talk back to their parents? If you don’t, perhaps your grandparents do.

In many of our books we talk about "Positive Time Out." There are several points that need to be made regarding time out for children who have not yet reached the age of reason:

When a child is disrespectful to teachers or classmates, the first source to consider is the behavior of the adults in this child's life. Children who aren't treated with respect have no model for respectful behavior.

In all of our books we talk about "Positive Time Out." There are several points that need to be made regarding time out for children who have not yet reached the age of reason.

Problems on the bus seem to be a major concern kindergarten through high school. Look at the behavior on any bus, anywhere in the world, and you will have a barometer of the development of (or lack of) internalized social skills, life skills, and social interest.

I had one of those this-is-what-makes-it-all-worthwhile events this morning. Yesterday, I did one of my "classroom visits" (a.k.a., teacher observation) and during part of the class a student was invited to the overhead projector to demonstrate how to solve a problem to the rest of the class (third grade). But as he tried to explain how to do the problem, he got all confused and stuck and couldn't work his way through it.

I had a "Positive Discipline Moment" today. One of our eighth grade teachers came to me with a student problem. It seems that Jennifer, the student, brought some kind of technological wizardry into Spanish class, some kind of computerized note pad that also has the capability of altering TV channels and sound, like a remote control.

In our mobile society it is not uncommon for some families to relocate several times in a child's school career. This was true for Jimmy who moved to our school from a West Coast inner-city school.