Consequences and the Real World
Q. I was the "Teacher from the Black Lagoon" last year and have been studying
Positive Discipline books this summer in an effort to avoid a return trip to the
Lagoon...
It sounds wonderful and very effective and I'm going to implement the class
meetings this school year (I teach kindergarten). I've read the
Positive Discipline in the Classroom book and
wonder about modifications for kindergarten aged children since many of the
communication techniques recommended seemed somewhat advanced. Does the
Positive Discipline for Preschoolers address
this or is more for toddlers? I don't want to waste money on a book that doesn't
offer what I'm looking for.
Also, as I change my philosophy to the PD theory, I question the lack of
negative consequences because, let's face it, they abound in the world. If I
don't do my job at work, I'll be faced with negative consequences. If I speed,
that cop won't be giving me a PD lesson but a ticket. Is this really preparing
kids for the real world when they grow up? The PD theory sounds wonderful and it
would be nice if the world was a nice. But it's not.
Victoria.
Hi Victoria,
The PDC book is better for Elementary than the
Preschool book, even though some language modification is needed. You know the
communication skills of your students and will know what needs to be modified.
However, I know this works for Kindergarten kids because I have been in many
Kindergarten classrooms were I almost had to pinch myself as a reminder that
these were not miniature sixth graders because they were using the skills and
the vocabulary of problem-solving and compliments. We had a group of teachers
visit one of Kindergarten classrooms where I was an elementary school counselor,
and they were amazed. They told me that they were writing a decision making
project and had decided kids wouldn't be ready for decision making until the
second grade. They said that decision would have to be changed after what they
had seen.
Regarding negative consequences: they will always be out there as a result of
our choices. As you say, we speed and we get a ticket. However, if students have
learned thinking skills, problem-solving skills, and concern for others, they
are less likely to make the kinds of choices that lead to negative consequences.
The world may not be completely nice, but it won't be nicer if we perpetuate
punishment and rebellion instead of good citizenship.
Following is what one teacher said after learning about class meetings. "If I'd
had class meetings when I was going to school I'd have learned about
problem-solving and real self-esteem instead of learning how to please the
teacher to her face, and then do whatever I could to 'belong and be important'
behind her back!"
I think that says it. I don't think negative consequences (poorly disguised
punishment imposed by a teacher) prepares kids for a negative world. On the
other hand, I don't think teachers and parents should rescue children from
experiencing failure when they don't turn in assignments or apply themselves
well enough to get passing grades. This isn't something the teacher imposes, but
allows. And this can be done with empathy. "I'm so sorry you chose to earn such
a low grade. I care about you. Is there anything I can do to help you do better
next time, because I have faith in you that you can learn from this experience."
This approach makes it difficult for the student to blame the teacher, and
really brings the focus to the students choices. Hope your lagoon will be a
beautiful blue one this year.
Jane Nelsen
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